27 posts tagged “life”
It seems like all I ever blog about is school, but considering I'm a student, school is my life and there isn't room for much else at the moment. Heh.
The school year is coming to a close, and I thank God for bringing me through yet another hellish but rewarding academic year. I've done well, for the most part, and I can't afford to lose momentum in the next two weeks. If anything, I'll need to remain focused and become more disciplined, as I have end of semester projects and final exams to get through. I have five papers and a makeup exam I need to get done by Tuesday, and my week will only get crazier from there. Oy. At least it's all ending soon, right?
I've also been reconsidering how I view myself and the world. As cliche as it sounds, I've identified a few things I actually like (to my surprise), some that I absolutely hate, and others that are rather insignificant and pointless to pick at. I want to be a different person come next August, the start of my final year as an undergraduate. I refuse to be the same whiny, depressive, negative little girl that I am now...I want to finally grow up and be mature, considerate, intelligent, motivated, and self-assured...characteristics that I already possess but need to refine over the summer.
I'm actually changing quite a few things about myself over the summer, and they're not all internal. My intensive diet and workout regimen will resume next month...and with the way I've planned it, there will be no slacking off. If I slack off this time around, then there truly is no hope for me. I've already subconsciously changed my eating habits, and that in itself is quite a feat. I'm eating healthier without having to consciously think about it...so many people struggle with that. I know I did in my past attempts.
I've also decided to change my last name, something I've been mulling over since last summer but only recently decided to do. I've explained this impending change to a few people, some of whom are completely confused as to why I'm changing the name I was born with. The short story is that my parents, particularly my father, never took a sincere interest in me, and when I finally reached out to him to try and establish a relationship with him, he didn't show much interest. My father, in my opinion, is a piece of shit, and since my maternal grandfather and my uncle are the only two men who have ever truly and honestly loved me and provided a positive image of what men are supposed to be, I choose to disregard his horrible example. With that said, I'm changing my name to my grandfather's name. Yes, it is my mother's maiden name, but I want to honor my grandfather.
Lastly, I'm really looking forward to my senior year. I have a few unique opportunities and can't wait to take advantage of them. One of them is getting to establish a HUGE community service project with my school's student government next fall, and I'm already stoked about it. Details later.
And that, dear friends, about does it for me. I have papers to write and only a few hours to do them in. Peace.
A better one.
Yeah, it would come out at sunset. It's been cloudy and raining all week. Boo.
Yeah, it's her birthday. She's 38. Go Mariah.
You must think I'm lame for mentioning a celebrity's birthday, but whatever. :P
I've spent the last 20 minutes trying to make this entry interesting, and it just isn't happening. Meh. The long and short of it: I've decided to put off going to law school in favor of getting a graduate degree in Political Science first. I still plan on getting a law degree, just not in the next four years. I prefer to give myself as much of an edge as possible and the only feasible way to do that is to get the grad degree, work in Washington, D.C. for a few years, then apply. I've been looking into becoming a congressional aide/assistant, and I'm confident I could be good at that and enjoy the experience at the same time. For some people, working as an aide would appear to be the most boring, tedious, and thankless job there is to be had in D.C., but not for me. This is possibly my ticket to Yale folks, so I don't cringe at the thought of interpreting pending legislation, doing grunt work, meeting with lobbyists, or fielding calls from angry constituents. Getting the grad degree could do so much more for my career than rushing and trying to force my way into just any law school. I've found that settling often leaves me too dissatisfied and unhappy when I know there was something else I could have done to get what I wanted. I want to get into the best law school possible, not just any law school that will just take me. Does that make sense? :D
If you were a bit lost with this entry, read the last one. It should make things clearer.
P.S. I don't have an unhealthy fixation (as one of my friends fears) on Yale Law, fine school that it is, it's just something to strive for, and if I'm not accepted there are other law schools that I'm interested in.
I need more than a week to regroup and refocus my energy. Spring Break is just too short of a vacation. I may have to lobby the Oklahoma Board of Regents and convince them to add a week to it. This past week wasn't enough. As for how I spent it, it was uneventful. I sat around my apartment eating, sleeping, and eating some more. I took a stab at an overdue assignment for my foreign policy class, and will probably attempt to finish it tonight or tomorrow morning. I refuse to have to do it over the weekend. I want to clean this place up before my roommate gets back from visiting family in Mississippi, because she'll definitely mess it up when does get back and I don't want it to look even worse than it does now. I like my roommate well enough, but she is not the cleanest person in the world. She's actually one of the laziest people I've ever met, myself included. The girl will leave dishes in the sink and garbage strewn about the apartment for days on end. I didn't know dirty dishes could make an entire apartment smell bad, but apparently they can. She even left dirty dishes in the sink before she left, and they've been sitting in the sink ever since. How anyone would be comfortable with leaving their home knowing things aren't in order is beyond me, but, everyone is different. I promised myself I wouldn't clean them earlier this week, but since I ate some of her food yesterday, it's the least I can do. Eating your roommate's food while they're out of town warrants some kissing up, even though they probably don't deserve it.
On top of cleaning and doing laundry, I have to file my tax return. Ugh. I kept putting it off this week, but apparently, I'm going to have to scramble to get it done. Shouldn't be too hard, but I so don't want to do it.
I enrolled for my fall courses on Thursday, after many, many, many pointless debates with the Bursar's office over how the last $200 left on my account was going to be paid off. I got lectured by several people in that office about my spending habits with the account, and they refused to let me enroll. WTF? Because I owe $200. They were quite comfortable with the thought of me not graduating because I still owed that amount from buying books and a couple things from the student apparel store in January. God forbid I buy a couple sweatshirts and a t-shirt to show my school pride. Fortunately for me, I happen to have more than a passing acquaintance with one of my university's vice presidents, who was nice enough to pay the rest of my balance with his department's discretionary funds. The fact that I stay in constant contact with him on a regular basis comes in handy from time to time, and I'm sure the Ferrer Rocher truffles I gave him for Christmas didn't hurt either. :D It could have been so much worse, considering I'd jumped through all the hoops they'd asked me to the week prior to my enrollment date (you have to get cleared to enroll a few days before enrollment if you still owe money), and then they decided not to let me enroll because of the remaining balance. Screw them. Still, it wasn't as bad when I owed significantly more last year ($8,000, to be precise). That was quite the fiasco, and how I actually met the VP who helped me this time. Let's just say I'm graduating a year later than I should be because I was only allowed to enroll in six hours last spring. But at least I'm graduating. Other students end up having to leave because the Bursar's office is far more interested in teaching them lessons in responsibility than it is in allowing them to get an education. Holy crap.
I'm so looking forward to graduating next year. So much. I'm really ready to get out of here, but I'm confused as to what my plans are going to be. I spent part of this week researching law schools to apply to, and when I want to go. I can't decide if I want to stay here and get a grad degree in Political Science, which would make a me stronger applicant to places such as Yale and Stanford (like I can get in :P), or just apply and hopefully be admitted to a regional school (OCU and Tulsa) and transfer after the first year. Staying would be more fruitful, but I'm more than eager to start my legal education. As fun as it is to think about, the process of applying is tedious, and well, a pain in the ass. I have to register with LSAC, and sign up for a day to take the LSAT. I was thinking of taking it this summer, but I haven't been committed to studying lately, so October 1,2007 it is! I'm a little overwhelmed. Staying has its benefits, but, I'll talk about that later.
I need to get back to my overdue paper. Peace out.
Sorry for the increase in depressing entries lately. I'll start making those private, because I definitely don't want to drag other people down with me, plus, I hate being reminded of the fact that I'm not the happiest I can possibly be at the moment. It'll pass though.
Tomorrow is the first day of spring break, and I am definitely in need of some time off, even if it is just for a week. Of course, this isn't a true vacation, I'll be volunteering at Legal Aid and probably working at my regular job a few days this week. On top of that, I have some homework to make up, some reading to catch up on, writing proposals for the mentoring program I'm in, and a moot court case to review for the moot court competition I'm participating in next month. The next six weeks should be pretty interesting, considering everything I have going on and the fact that finals are right around the corner.
Burned out? Who's burned out? :D
Well, not ALL of them, but it seems like people in my life (offline and on) are becoming more and more displeased with me with each passing day. The ones who aren't abandoning me are intent on helping me with my flaws, whether I appreciate it or not. Sigh. I just want to curl up into a little ball and make the world go away.
